Do spouses freak when your hobby turns to an OBSESSION??!!

[Pompadour Discus]

So before last month I owned just one 30 gallon tank of freshwater fish. Thanks to Petco's one dollar a gallon sale I soon added a 40 gallon and a 75 gallon. Granted the 40 gallon is for a sump, but my hubby has no idea what that is, all he sees is another tank. But so far he is fully supportive, stating: "it's OK you need this for your hobby and whatever makes you happy baby." Then I totally without asking (whoops) because excitement got the best of me, made an offer to a Craigslist ad, that was accepted! Omg totally didn't think the guy would say yes, just wanted to make some low ball offer because of what he was selling. And this is what he was selling:
104230
104231

Totally not ready to breed at all but I know one day in the future I would like to try it. And he was selling 2-40G and 4-20G and two huge stands and a light and I offer him $150 and he said yes!! What the heck! I'm guessing that's good deal, at least to me it is. I'm so excited I totally forgot (uh oh) the hubby and the fact I just bought 6 tanks! :eek:

So I get home ( hubby isn't home yet) and like always sign on to simply discus and check the new post. Oh no someone posted that petsmart was having a black Friday sale! Why did they tell me this?! I just can't stop myself I have to go an look. Just as I was yelling to myself about a 120g being on sale, my hubby walks thru and ask what I was so excited about. I show him and of course being the best he says let's get it! Yay for me, but not for him since he still doesn't know about the other 6 tanks yet :o So we ended up in the basement to move stuff around and he says "Your taking over my man cave, but I can deal with one more tank" :O oh no oh no oh no oh no! I just can't tell him, I'm so scared he will freak. I was thinking maybe I could just go get everything by myself and just set it up and maybe he won't notice or won't mind as much since it will already be there. I had all kind of crazy thoughts.

Well I ended up telling him, he of course thought I was nuts. But didn't freak out too much, but is really worried about space. I just can't help myself. How in the world do you guys restrain yourselves in this hobby??!! Because I can't stop. I have managed to keep the funds down, by making crazy lowball offers, waiting for sales and using mostly money from bonuses, prizes or selling some of my stuff. So I haven't used too much of our household expenses, which is helping my new marriage alot lol. By the way we have only been married exactly 2 months and 1 day today. So far so good :heart1: .....if I don't buy any more tanks lol

[Neptune]

lmao! YEP!

The powerball was/is up to $325,000,000.
My wife said if we win the first thing we do is build a new house and you get a fishroom! LOL...

I'm trying to figure out how to a new tank into the house without her freaking.
After 30 years of suffering on her part you think she would be use to the "Ask forgiveness not permission" trick!?????

[hdhong]

I don't know how people restrain themselves from going crazy with discus either Pompadour. I'm just like you started out with a 10 gallons tank with some goldfish, then BAM I started to buy more tanks whenever they have $1/gal deal at Petco or Petsmart. I'm now with 3-20gals, 1-40gals, 1-55gal, and 1-75-gals. I will also go to petsmart during black Friday to get the 125gal with the stand included as well. I can't stop buying discus. The more discus I get the bigger the tank I need to get. Luckily my wife also likes fish, so she's very supportive. Like your significant other she also said "It's your hobby, you can do whatever you want." At least I got her a fan tail goldfish tank that she always wanted, so she likes that tank a lot. She likes to look at all the fishes, but doesn't like to clean or change water for them. I have to do all the work, but I guess you have to do what you need to do to keep the hobby going.

[Pompadour Discus]

lmao! YEP!

The powerball was/is up to $325,000,000.
My wife said if we win the first thing we do is build a new house and you get a fishroom! LOL...

I'm trying to figure out how to a new tank into the house without her freaking.
After 30 years of suffering on her part you think she would be use to the "Ask forgiveness not permission" trick!?????

LMAO so that's what that trick is called hahahaha I've been using that for awhile

[Pompadour Discus]

I don't know how people restrain themselves from going crazy with discus either Pompadour. I'm just like you started out with a 10 gallons tank with some goldfish, then BAM I started to buy more tanks whenever they have $1/gal deal at Petco or Petsmart. I'm now with 3-20gals, 1-40gals, 1-55gal, and 1-75-gals. I will also go to petsmart during black Friday to get the 125gal with the stand included as well. I can't stop buying discus. The more discus I get the bigger the tank I need to get. Luckily my wife also likes fish, so she's very supportive. Like your significant other she also said "It's your hobby, you can do whatever you want." At least I got her a fan tail goldfish tank that she always wanted, so she likes that tank a lot. She likes to look at all the fishes, but doesn't like to clean or change water for them. I have to do all the work, but I guess you have to do what you need to do to keep the hobby going.

Oh my gosh kindred spirit!

[Debow]

Ya my wife questions why I need so many tanks and thinks I have a problem. I say if you think this is bad you should see some of the members on simply!

[Neptune]

Ya my wife questions why I need so many tanks and thinks I have a problem. I say if you think this is bad you should see some of the members on simply!

Or use this one..."Keeps me out of the bars and off the streets!"

[RogueDiscus]

Honestly LOL! Welcome to the world of discus keeping. I have 3 75's and 3 55's in my den. I've taken down the 4 29's for now until I build my shop. ;)

[RobbieRobV]

Please tell your husband that I'm sorry I posted that black friday sale at Petsmart. I know exactly how you feel since my wife is about to disown me any second now. I start with just telling her that I wanted a 55 gallon tank with some guppies to breed and enjoy with our daughters and now i have a bunch of discus, a 55, 75, 2x40 breeders and I actually went to Petsmart and purchased the 125@ $649 and spoke to the general manager about returning it first thing in the morning and repurchasing it for $300 just to make sure I didn't miss out on this deal. She reluctantly agreed and told me just to bring in the receipt which was exactly what I was hoping would happen. During the transition of discus from my 75 to the 125, my living room looks like the corner of a LFS showroom. Needless to say, I have to get off the internet and start working on transferring everything over ASAP. :D

[Pompadour Discus]

During the transition of discus from my 75 to the 125, my living room looks like the corner of a LFS showroom. Needless to say, I have to get off the internet and start working on transferring everything over ASAP. :D

Lol! I have a feeling his man cave will look the same very soon. And I will be blaimg you the whole time ;):p lol and good deal I would be so mad if that mgr said no. I'm just glad I'm not alone!!

[DiscusRob]

Or use this one..."Keeps me out of the bars and off the streets!"

+1

Keeping fish requires a certain skill set, you have to be part electrician, part plumber, part shrink, and part salesman. If you don't master them all you will sooner or later be in the dog house:evilgrin::evilgrin::evilgrin:

[adrian31@outlook.com]

Or use this one..."Keeps me out of the bars and off the streets!"

Exactly! I think my wife accepts my hobby as a good thing. But she did comment this morning that I give it so much attention that she's looking around for a 'Discus Costume' she can wear around the house:)

[runninlow]

^^^^^

DiscusRob you said it correctly!

[hdhong]

exactly! I think my wife accepts my hobby as a good thing. But she did comment this morning that i give it so much attention that she's looking around for a 'discus costume' she can wear around the house:)

lol

[Pompadour Discus]

Exactly! I think my wife accepts my hobby as a good thing. But she did comment this morning that I give it so much attention that she's looking around for a 'Discus Costume' she can wear around the house:)

LMBO!!!!! Hahahahahha

[Pompadour Discus]

OMG I need to be in shackles lol, or have my internet shut off from the world or just this wonderful site. I just read another post about the Fluval FX6 going on sale from $339 to $170 and of course I went straight to the site and purchased it, this is madness! And of course didn't consult with the husband who is at the Lions game right now, thankfully. I just can't stop:eek::bomb:

[LizStreithorst]

I didn't keep fish when my husband was alive but I did have a hobby that consumed all my time and money. My husband was old school. He believed that it was his job to pay normal bills and the money I made was mind to spend as I felt fit. I know, that's not generally the way these days.

I worked like a dog making money that I threw at my hobby. He was proud of my success. He didn't measure my success by how much money I made. He measured it by my wins in the show ring and the degree of respect I received by folks in the hobby. I hope you and your husband have a similar relationship.

[Pompadour Discus]

I didn't keep fish when my husband was alive but I did have a hobby that consumed all my time and money. My husband was old school. He believed that it was his job to pay normal bills and the money I made was mind to spend as I felt fit. I know, that's not generally the way these days.

I worked like a dog making money that I threw at my hobby. He was proud of my success. He didn't measure my success by how much money I made. He measured it by my wins in the show ring and the degree of respect I received by folks in the hobby. I hope you and your husband have a similar relationship.

I'm sorry for your loss he sounds wonderful. My marriage is very new and we never lived together so this whole 'we' thing is still something I'm working through. My hubby is great, very supportive so far, and hasn't gotten mad yet, but I'm sure he will soon. I haven't used any household expenses and its my own money but I just feel guilty still.
But my money has to also help with the bills, we live very minimally. We don't even have cable TV. I don't have the latest phone. I don't even own a laptop or a tablet lol and we are not old just frugal.

[LizStreithorst]

I asked what the arrangement would be before we got hitched. It's easier knowing what both of you expect of one another beforehand that rather than fighting over what you have done after it's done.

[Candydiscus]

Im not married yet but my fiance knows im into fish, I have 8 tanks in my place. 4 of em smaller betta tanks like 10-5-2.5g tanks, The other tanks are bigger like 30-44-55-92g. I want a huge tank like 200g if i could get something that big id sell most of my tanks like the 44-55g and possible some smaller betta tanks. I tell any woman ive dated that if they dont like my aquarium hobby or my hobby with my two Jeeps and me working on my Jeeps alot. Then we shouldnt be dating.

I wont set asside hobbies for a woman.. Sorry i know thats wierd but no one is going to change me

[LizStreithorst]

She's married now. The die has been cast. They should have a sit down and have a serious talk. With no agreement decided on one of them will cross the line and the other will be pissed.

[Candydiscus]

who is she ? If your talking about me lol, no we arent married yet.. lol, and she already knows i have aquariums and my stance on them and my Jeeps. She often says i love my Jeep more then her LOL.

And she has already offered to buy me a big 150-200g fish tank. So we dont have to have a sit down lol

[LizStreithorst]

I figured that PompadourDiscus is female.

[Candydiscus]

oh, reply with a qoute then i wasnt sure who you were talking too

[LizStreithorst]

Sorry to have made it confusing. I know that you're a guy. I check Pompondor's user profile. She is indeed female.

[Candydiscus]

Sorry to have made it confusing. I know that you're a guy. I check Pompondor's user profile. She is indeed female.



I wasnt talking about who is a guy or woman, but when you reply on the thread without a qoute no one will know who you are talking too.

Unless your guy comment was ment as a sexist remark "oh im a guy i cant multi task" kind of comment

[Pompadour Discus]

I asked what the arrangement would be before we got hitched. It's easier knowing what both of you expect of one another beforehand that rather than fighting over what you have done after it's done.
Hi! Yes I am indeed female :) And yeah we spoke before marriage and agreed it would have to be a two-family income until he becomes a full-time firefighter or fulltime at the airport whichever comes first. Which is why I try only to use money I have gotten from bonuses, or selling stuff. So far I have been sticking to that and it hasn't cause any friction yet. It's more about the guilt, than him really. This is the first time in my life I tackled a hobby this large and expensive, and that's all for me. I don't usually buy stuff for myself.

[LizStreithorst]

lol I shall do my best to be more careful in the future.

[two utes]

I just read your thread and had a jolly good laugh, so thanks for that :)

Its great to hear that you're getting into the hobby and enjoying it by the looks. Its also great that your husband understands, and supports you. We all need to have something that we enjoy in life...l have a few. My wife is very understanding and supportive of my needs, and what makes me happy, makes her happy, and visa versa.

She also has a few hobbies, and l dare not ask her what she spends....especially on her Harry Potter memorabilia. She has one room in our house which is like a Harry Potter Museum. She is a Harry Potter fan, and even though l don't enjoy Harry Potter. l'm glad that she has an escape as l do.

We have been married for 34 years, so hang in there :) .....We're here for a good time, not a long time :D

[Jenene]

Exactly! I think my wife accepts my hobby as a good thing. But she did comment this morning that I give it so much attention that she's looking around for a 'Discus Costume' she can wear around the house:)

I get it too. I had to ask my husband to scootch over on the couch because his head was blocking my view of the Discus. That's another thing- how can you turn your back to the tank? Don't you want to look at the Discus? How can you not look at them???

[adrian31@outlook.com]

I get it too. I had to ask my husband to scootch over on the couch because his head was blocking my view of the Discus. That's another thing- how can you turn your back to the tank? Don't you want to look at the Discus? How can you not look at them???

That should be the main goal, enjoying the Discus. Yes I think it's also enjoyable, therapeutic even, cleaning & caring for them but in the end I want to see beautiful, healthy Discus in a nice setup. My wife fixed up the tank's area with couches, a bookshelf & table for all my fish supplies, so she really likes them too. I cracked up when she made the joke about the Discus costume:)

[Candydiscus]

That should be the main goal, enjoying the Discus. Yes I think it's also enjoyable, therapeutic even, cleaning & caring for them but in the end I want to see beautiful, healthy Discus in a nice setup. My wife fixed up the tank's area with couches, a bookshelf & table for all my fish supplies, so she really likes them too. I cracked up when she made the joke about the Discus costume:)



Thats why my tank is in my bedroom. I have a 92g corner bowfront, much much bigger then a 90g rectangle tank, at least i think so, with it being 28 inches tall and 36 inches front to back, and 4ft long at its longest point. And its like 2 feet from my bed, and as i sit here on my computer/desk i can turn my head to the right a little and boom 2 feet away all my discus/neons are right in front of me.. I love it