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View Full Version : The healing power of a Loving Hug



happygirl65
03-20-2008, 03:11 PM
The power of a hug or holding your child is not to be taken lightly.

My four year old little boy had to have his second surgery in less than a year on St. Patty's day. It was an inguinal hernia first one side last May and then the next early this week.

We were waiting and waiting, he is begging me for food and water which I can't give...then they pull us aside to tell us the risks one of which is that he "could" die. Which I knew having been through this already last May, but hearing the anesthetist say the word...or rather spell it so as not to alarm my little boy made my heart sink into the pit of my stomach.

They finally took him to surgery assuring me that they would take good care of him etc. My husband and I took our 3 yr old daughter with us for a walk (couldn't get a sitter wouldn't you know) and she was the best distraction. We got some food so that we would not be eating in front of Mikey afterwards and then came back to the waiting room.
The surgery went fine and we were able to be there as he woke up. I thought I was prepared after having done it with him once before but this time he started screaming as he was waking up. He was in so much pain. I tried so hard to hold it together but I couldn't hold back my tears.
They gave him more meds but they would take a while to take effect. He was crying out "Make it stop Mommy!" If only I had powers like the superheros he loves so much. :(

I was crying silently, tears streaming and not even my deep breathing exercises could calm my anxiety. I was just holding his hand and telling him that I was there. But it was not enough. His vitals were all over the place. My every instinct told me that I needed to hold my baby. (OK so what if he is 58 pounds and insists that he is a "big boy" every other day of the week.)

The surgical nurse :angel: brought me a rocking chair and I picked him up and rocked him and sang to him and he settled right down.

His pulse slowed, oxygen sat. went up and he slowly woke up. Maybe I had some sort of superhero powers afterall. I knew he would be ok when he started asking me where his spiderman and batman action figures were. :)

I held it together for the rest of the day but for the last couple of days now I have had waves of anxiety off and on and every little tiny thing sets me off and the worry starts.

It is helpful to play around in my planted tank and watch my fish and now that the ordeal is over and he is healing things are starting to return to normal.

But the whole experience really stresses in my mind how important it is to hold the ones we love. Our human touch does so much more than we can ever imagine until we are in a traumatic situation.

I think my holding Mikey did as much for me as it did for him. Our creator really gave us a gift here with this thing we call love. :)

I will never forget the feeling it gave me when he opened his sleepy little eyes and looked up at me and said "Mommy, you're so beautiful, I love you so much." and then snuggled deeper into my arms. (So what if it was all the drugs they pumped into him...it was my love that made him comfortable....that's my story and I'm sticking to it. :) )

fuzz16
03-21-2008, 03:01 PM
as someone who is expecting i can say that this touched me and at the same time terrifies me.

makes you never want to forget all the little things in life and appreciate every moment of it-the good and the bad

happygirl65
03-21-2008, 03:41 PM
So true. You really do have to appreciate every single moment. They grow so fast and you just never know what will happen tomorrow.
Each day is a blessing....I just have to keep reminding myself of that as I am re-painting the walls courtesy of my budding artist. :)

Brian Mc
03-21-2008, 04:14 PM
Glad to hear Mikey is doing better, that had to be rough. The power of a hug is incredible, right after we had our 1st child I was a little shell-shocked and kind of going thru the motions, I picked him up one night and was holding him and he hugged me, I was like 'wow' this is a real person. :angel:

phidelt85
03-22-2008, 09:02 AM
I am so glad, Mikey is healing well for you guys. Makes me want to go grab my son up and hold him; sucks he's two hours away and I'm at work. Your words are so true and heart felt, and I must say you made this grown man shed a few tears just reading your story if I may call it that.

happygirl65
03-22-2008, 10:27 AM
Thank you. :) Writing down my story was a sort of therapy for me, to help it sink in about everything that happened and that he will now be fine. I think it might actually have been harder on me than him. :)

Having other parents read it and know exactly what I mean, how they would feel, and knowing that they have felt that wonderful hug makes me feel connected to something larger than myself so I thank you for commenting. :)

Mikey is doing great now, having pain every once in a while but it has been 5 full days and I have to remind him now to take it easy. They heal so fast. I got a little behind on my housework snuggling with him on the couch for a few days but it was worth it. I knew being there made him feel better.

It is also amazing how much my patience has increased after an experience like that as he was off the couch and back to making horrendous messes yesterday.

phidelt85
03-22-2008, 12:13 PM
We had to go threw the pains parents go through when their children are in pain a few years ago with Jacob. Jacob is our only son and a few years ago he had to have his tonsils removed. No biggie, until you look into their eyes and see the fear and the IVs sticking out of their little hands. It broke my heart when he came out of surgery and woke up in screams. My wife did the exact same thing you did with Mikey and it calmed him right down back to sleep. It really is amazing the power a Mother's touch has with her child. That very moment proved how strong it is to me.

I'm glad you feel better now, and if it helped posting up here, then all the better. I know how that feels too. :D

two utes
03-22-2008, 04:13 PM
In my oppinion, mums are super heroes
I am sorry to read about your son, but overwhellmed by the power of a hug.
I am glad that once again everything has turned out well for you. I sometimes feel a tingle going through my whole body when recieving a hug from a loved one.
Way to go 'Florence'.....if a may call you that.;)